How to Master the Art of Venting

TThe scientific definition of ventilation is to leave the air or to put pressure. In psychology, ventilation is based on the expression of emotions, in particular negative emotions. When psychological ventilation is done in an adaptive and healthy way, the pressure is relieved; The system and the brain are less stressed. However, when ventilation is carried out in an unsuitable or unhealthy way, people can actually feel worse.

There are backs and things to do with ventilation. Many people have evacuated in an unhealthy way because they reflect what they have seen in the people they admired. If you had a parent who expressed impulsively negative emotions without intention and without perspicacity, this is how you will probably be evacuated as an adult. If you see a parent or a tutor to rarely evacuate verbally and slam doors or physically express negative repressed emotions, you can present similar ventilation styles. Even if you had a healthy model for growing ventilation, you can adapt to unsuitable ventilation if you acclimatize to a group or an organization where unhealthy ventilation takes place.

Think of certain industries which are high issues where it is customary for people to cry and communicate aggressively. Likewise, if you enter an industry where ventilation and expression of emotions is often discouraged, you can queue and have a similar style not to communicate with negative emotions and push them down.

It is important to understand that ventilation is an art and that there are DOs and things to do clearly based on research. As a psychiatrist and researcher of happiness, one of the biggest false ideas I have seen with my clients is something that I call the fantastic therapy session. They imagine that they will be able to lie on a sofa, pour all the problems, and these problems will disappear as if by magic, in a few sessions.

This is not how it works. Therapy is not lying on a sofa so that someone else can understand you. It’s a lot of work for you as a patient. You will discover certain things that traumatize or trigger. You will have to do the work to treat and prevail over healing memories, complicated relationships and negative thinking patterns. I tell my patients that the brain is a stubborn organ. Referring to yourself and getting to know your true me is not fast, but it is deeply fulfilled.

Find out more: Is ventilation healthy, or does it aggravate things?

Another error that I saw people doing by trying to release their stress or their frustrations is the trauma of derogation from their stress and his frustrations on their friends, family and loved ones, vomitly vomit all their problems and leave the person who would listen to them. The bad news is that the other person could be so visibly deactivated by the experience you both closed.

The good news is that all these things are easy to avoid. Just ask yourself the following four questions before, during and after having evacuated to another person.

Did I choose the right person?

I know people who traumators throw everywhere. You must choose a person – not an army – to let off steam. You must also be aware of passing out to someone who has the capacity to hear your complaints. Could there be emotional repercussions if, for example, you evacuate how small your bonus was this year for your friend who is struggling to join both ends? Is it insensitive to complain about how your children are overwhelming with your friend who may have a hard time infertility?

I see that it happens all the time. It is also important to call the only person you should never evacuate: anyone you are in a position of power. When an individual with more power reveals a weakness, the perception of the disclosure receiver is affected negatively. Their quality of relationship and their effectiveness of tasks are compromised. By presenting weakness at work, employees of higher statutes can inadvertently trigger their own loss of status – which raises the question: what exactly, qualifies exactly as a weakness? The researchers define them as personal information which “makes the protrusion a personal gap”.

The same goes for your personal life; Do not evolve towards your child, because it will affect their emotional regulation skills. I don’t care about the hilarious of a disaster to which you went. No matter how horrible your ex-husband has treated you-does not throw it to your baby-sitter. You hang these people with your problems. Even if you laugh at the cheap date that the guy you have met on a meeting application was, your child is still quietly worried about you. And even if she would never say, your cleaning lady could always want to listen to music instead of hearing you with your bad boss. You are the bad boss now, abusing your power.

Did I ask for permission?

While your therapist is a professional that you pay to listen to yourself and group therapy has rules concerning integrated sharing, in a friendship, you need a green light to unload. You might say, “Do you have a moment to listen to what happened to me this morning?” or “please let me know

If it becomes too much for you. You can also monitor the indices that the other person can go to them.

Have I learned something?

To avoid the spill of trauma, you must keep space to get comments from the other person to help you better understand your situation. It is not a one -way conversation. You should listen to the other people’s questions and receive the comments they have, especially if you talk to a professional. Research reveals that ventilation is more effective when the person you are talking about challenges you and gives you constructive comments, because if the person does not challenge you, you will probably not get the best party of the conversation.